some things never change

jenny went to her cross fit training class

i hit the weights then drained a glass of beer

she texted me she was staying

for the advanced session

 

i empty another beer

went and found a taco vendor

i didn’t fill my flask

lately i’ve been thinking

about my liver

 

and about love

there have been plenty

but they all left

(golly, i can’t imagine why)

and jenny is too new

to be overdue

 

i look as the light starts to fade

on these dark streets of decay

los angeles is a dirty city

grime and crime

calloused cultivation

 

an onslaught of off ramps

leading to loneliness

 

people look away when i look

i start on my second taco

and though i am happier these days

i still harbor thoughts

that this is all inconsequential

 

let jenny have her gym

to many egos there that think they matter

“what do you do for work?

what kind of car do you drive?

how often do you work out?”

 

well i don’t work cause the book

money hasn’t run out yet

we have a car now

but as far as i’m concerned

it’s jenny’s

and i do twelve ounce curls everyday

 

when jenny takes off the leash

and let’s me out of the yard

i still go trolling around the streets

drink too much

notice the tight t-shirts and tank tops

in this silicone valley

 

and i don’t aspire

because after all is said and done

i haven’t acquired

a new outlook on things

 

just have a different place to be

most nights

 

jenny is a garden of delights

where i often plant my seed

 

out here it’s just weeds

concrete

fear

indifference

walking with a wary eye

knowing that atoms like to lie

(they make up everything)

 

and beyond that

i don’t have an explanation

or understanding

even if lately i have looked

to the heavens

and wondered

 

***