(morrison,
morrison what did you die for?
morrison says, “nothing at all”)
i
had a dream an endless dream
born
in the darkest night
and
in this dream at two extremes
i
lost my wings midflight
the
impact found against the ground
was
all the rage and all around…
oh
my god this poem sucks
who
do i think i am? Poe?
i
have been quiet lately
not
drinking
lifting
a lot of weights
can’t
sleep
can’t
eat
can’t
listen to music
she’s
gone
the
why will wilt with the weeping willow
i
found the goodbye note
attached
to the dissolution of marriage
she
took her stuff
the
car
asked
for nothing more
i
signed the papers
dropped
them in the mail
it
hurts
and
i am embracing the realm
of
nothing matters
like
i never have before
i
always knew you could feel a presence
but
i never knew you could
feel
a presence missing
what
use to be a home
is
now four walls
i
hate this studio apartment
and
even though i am dead inside
nothing
deadens the pain
i
had titled this second act
“sunrise
on the dark streets of decay”
now
i need a new title
or
this is the start
of
the third and final act
i
would flip to the final page
to
see how it ends
but
the final page has not been written
because
i don’t know what will be
only
that i have no hope
because
i have no faith
and
wince when someone says,
“it’s
a nice day outside”
no
it’s not
it
just is
there
is no overarching definition
true
from one end of the cosmos to the other
of
what a nice day outside is
just
what we perceive
to
some the seattle rain is a nice day
to
others the montana snow
to
others this l. a. heat
goodbye
jenny
i
will perceive you no more
tonight
i will enter the earth’s core
have
the heat incinerate my mind
until
it is nothing but scattered atoms
total
devastation
not
even a memory
just
a landscape that was slashed and burned
in
other words
i’m
heading out to a bar
somewhere
in this city
where
the neighborhoods, businesses
and
intersections
are
all interconnected by
the
dark streets of decay
***
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