i
sour at this granola cereal and soy milk
but
it’s all she had in her place
i
think she’s going to comment
on
the look on my face
but
says,
“the
way you talked to me
when
i offered to compensate you for another drink
and
your poems
‘oh
gawd, another uppity woman one and two’
how
does a man become a feminist?”
“i’m
not a feminist. i’m a conglomeration of words.
i
don’t know why, but women to me are not whores
but
goddesses to be worshipped and adored”
she
blinks
takes
my half eaten cereal to the sink
turns
and whispers,
“how
did i get so lucky?”
i
rise and bring an embrace
our
bodies pressed
she
feels my arousal
grabs
me by the ear
and
steers me to the bed
*
she
leaves for work
i
leave to go check on my cat
she
knows i’ll be back
but
after a shower
a
slice of leftover pizza
a
beer while i pet my cat
and
uploading to my blog
i
go out on the balcony
for
a smoke
halfway
through
she
is on my sidewalk
looking
up at me
“can
i come up?”
i
nod
she
disappears
i
know i verbally told her
my
address
she
must have
an
incredible memory
i
wait at my door
watching
her walk the hallway
she
looks as if she is trying
to
stay composed
i
close the door behind us
and
she sits on the couch
while
saying,
“drink?”
i
go to the kitchen to make her one
i
place it in her hand while asking,
“was
work slow?”
“yes,
they were asking for a volunteer
to
go home early
i
said i’d go
i
had been groped twice tonight
and
just didn’t want to be there”
my
hand rubs my mouth
something
i do
when
i don’t know what to say
she
downs her drink
and
hands it to me
i
go to make another
sit
by her while she sips
then
she puts the glass down
curls
into my arms
and
starts to cry
i
learned long ago to try and not
fix
everything all at once
so
i just hold her
it
may not even have
been
the hands tonight
but
a life time of hands
she
is reacting too
objectified
not
valued
for
the person that she is
my
cat gets in on the act
curls
between us
jenny
strokes her fur
“let’s
go to hollywood”
i
say
jenny
lifts her head
says,
“that's random”
“that’s
how i roll” i tell her
she
rolls her eyes
shrugs
says,
“let
me wash my face”
and
to the bus stop we go
*
ah
avenue
of the stars
jenny
says i’m acting
like
a kid in a candy shop
but
she knows from my blog
how
much i love this place
instead
of roam
we
rush as i take her everywhere
there
is to go among
all
this neon
i
suddenly burst out laughing
amid
all that is happening around us
“i
wish life could always be like this”
she
says
caught
up in the moment i declare
“then
move in with me”
shock
arrests her face
she
is silent
her
expression unreadable
and
i begin to think
i’ve
just made a huge mistake
then
she suddenly
quietly
says,
“o.k.”
i
return to my former feelings of elation
though
now it is not hollywood
but
her
the
boulevard fades from existence
as
i take her in an embrace
and
just hold her
for
a really long time
***
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