fondling the fabric of non-existence

the fragrance of forgetfulness is floating in my mind

i disappear and all the years are farther than behind

i plant the seed and watch the weeds create in-fertile ground

the happenstance of circumstance will fall without a sound

 

and i will be the only me that i can ever be

i master the illusion of a spring time blossom tree

i weigh the words that i have heard but never tip the scale

a vampire bite is impolite and worthy to impale

 

a gentle touch is still a touch to those of us abused

we flinch and lean upon our crutch and all the things we use

to get us by the lows and highs that dance within a day

we see a myriad of paths but always are afraid

 

and those which have escaped the rape of body, soul and mind

cannot see the fear in me that nothing can unwind

to worship at the feet of gods who love you like a son

will never resonate with me with what my father’s done

 

mother mary quite contrary a virgin and a queen

never taught my mother love at least not what i’ve seen

unless i’m wrong and all along the things my parents did

is how the gods above show love to each and every kid

 

but either way the things i say will not change who i am

the waters urge with every surge but cannot break the dam

that holds it there against its will with an un-yielding force

and laughs at my captivity knowing it is the source

that makes me fear the far and near and all that’s in-between

their words and welts that i have felt my mind will never wean

 

***