Tuesday, November 1, 2016

without the permission of preachers or politicians


words over the years

          don’t mean much

i don’t remember any of my words

but i remember every touch

 

i don’t fear death

but i despise his hooded robe

he’s come recently for ones i love

which has brought me more clarity

than any of this living has ever done

 

lately compassion is my fashion

helped a stranded motorist

get his car started

fed another homeless person

asked a young strung out girl

          crying in the rain

if she needed help

she replied,

“please don’t tell anybody”

i let her be

but i can still see

her fragile form folding

under the force of

everyone’s own frailty

 

i don’t give a fuck

what you think of me

and yes

my high wire act

will not always be death defying

 

but i will be the first

to pick you up out of the gutter

i’ve often lain in

 

utter

the melodic piano melody

that helps us to see

there just might be

more than all this

 

offer a warm towel for your tears

feed you

and my love is unconditional

i’ll even share my cigarettes

and whiskey

if that’s what you need

 

i remember this church i once attended

they brought this filthy vile sinner

to the leader of the recovery ministry

who was in recovery himself

advising him of the weakness

of the condemned

he threw his arms around him

everyone dropped their stones

and walked away

 

because forgiveness is the most

powerful force this universe

has ever witnessed

 

and i don’t want to get into

a god conundrum

the if

then why

 

and i don’t know if that

beautiful girl

with the pink hair

will receive divine assistance

to overcome

what no one else can

or if she’ll just be another statistic

with a needle in her arm

blood no longer coursing

through her veins

 

but that doesn’t mean

i may as well

dismiss all others

to the depths of hell

while i build a tower

that reaches the heavens

 

all i’m saying is

i can’t save anybody

but i can react to

the immediate need

right in front of me

in that very moment

and make that

instead of my make believe

selfish need

the priority

 

is this god waiting for me

instead of me waiting for god

again i don’t know

 

and the need in front of me

is too great

to have time to carry on conversation

with the council of the reservation

 

and i don’t do this to be

counted worthy

because

yeah

if there is such a thing

as a sinner

the devil has wallpapered hell

with me as his poster child

 

i’m just asking if it’s such

an awful thing

to have humility

heaped by hardship

be the plow

that breaks the hardness of the

fallow ground of your heart

so seeds can be planted

that grow apart from the weeds

so that there is a fruitful crop

whose harvest

might have a value beyond

the market place

 

nothing will be erased

nothing will be sustained

by my hand

no gesture is grand

 

but because of me

a man made his way home

in his car

a homeless person

slept with a full belly

and the girl with the pink hair?

 

well, i can’t fix everything

but she still weighs

heavy on my heart

i look for her on every corner

so maybe i can be the one

who carries her to an emergency room

so she can live to know

the beautiful moments

that exists when the selfishness

cultivated by the fear

of meeting your own needs

has been freed

by finding

the real meaning of life

 

***

 

 

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