Saturday, September 5, 2015

under an august moon


missy slept

i fled

walked, roamed

drank till i couldn’t

feel my face

 

fell asleep on a beach

woke to cold ocean air

phone filled with queries

from missy

 

i threw it into

the surge of the sea

 

eased

into the day

coffee

water

diet pepsi and a sandwich

just one cigarette

 

it reached rush hour

i started drinking

bar hopped

walked

 

stopped

at a convenience store

more smokes

 

overheard a clerk

at the other register by the door

telling a woman

her card was declined

and she couldn’t buy

the baby formula

 

when i heard her beseech

something reached deep

inside

it was jenny

about to cry

 

i walked up and paid the clerk

she said nothing

but handed me the bag

and pushed the baby stroller

to the car

i followed

stood

as she put our daughter

in the car seat

 

she got into the driver’s seat

started the engine

unlocked all the doors

i got in

 

she drove

i noticed she was on empty

told her to pull into

a gas station

 

i filled her tank

got back in

no other words were spoken

 

back at the place

i had left one night

not too long ago

and just never returned

she parked

took our daughter in

while i sat there holding the sack

 

i went in

 

she took the formula

i took a seat on the couch

slouched

fell asleep

 

*

 

woke up weak and sick

jenny gave me a popsicle stick

with electrolytes

and started breakfast

after i ate

she put our daughter in my lap

took my wallet

left

 

*

 

daughter down for a nap

jenny came back

arms full of groceries

put them on the counter

and asked me to join her

on the balcony

she closed the sliding glass door

behind me

turned and covered my cheek

with a slap

 

went back inside and started

putting away groceries

i lit a smoke

watched her through the glass

and when i saw her take beer

form a bag

and put it in the frig

i said in soliloquy

“i guess i’m home”

 

***

 

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