Monday, December 14, 2015

bottom feeders perform a necessary function


at the party

coke and bacardi

a cigarette is overdue

go outside

rain is the sky

i move my shoes

 

walk the block

invisible boundaries

move on

munch an edible

 

it’s kind of strange

nothing’s changed

i quit and then i start again

addiction is my only friend

 

a recent critique

i heard him say

about the dark streets of decay,

“he is one messed up individual”

 

drenched i find an overhang

an “out of business” shop

i feel the high creeping

light a smoke

and know i can’t argue

with the critic’s assessment

 

but i can never understand

why it is the artist

who is assessed

and not their art

 

high i’m feeling no chagrin

i’m back out in the wet again

 

the earth’s crust is thinnest in death valley

but as i piss in this alley

i know 15 miles is still too far to dig

i twist the top off my flask and swig

 

the downpour forces me to blink

but this immersion

is the only connection i feel

and i recite a verse i wrote

a long time ago,

 

“i saw the sky dance on the earth

connecting all the universe

with air to spare and no one there

the earth and sky were everywhere”

 

soothingly stoned i laugh

light a smoke and say,

“this is me not caring”

 

everyone else is sharing

mostly to fulfill their own need

a purpose, a creed

they are certain their certainty

justifies the bleed

 

and i am isolated

like the last rain drop

that will fall from the sky

 

i only know one day i’ll die

of nothing else am i certain

 

the rain is like a curtain

dropping down on the stage of life

 

i’m drenched and entrenched

how can the truth set me free

when i perceive

that we cannot know what is true

 

misconstrue and undo

when this night is through

i will sleep away the day

then go out and play

on the dark streets of decay

but for now

i’m just really fucking high

 

***

 

 

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